Thursday, November 10, 2011
meet daxton. his arrival has been greatly anticipated by multitudes of wonderful people. he'll surpass your wildest expectations, so just get ready because the journey is just beginning.
we woke up early this morning in preparation to head to the hospital around 10:30. we wanted to make sure dax's clothes and diaper bag were ready to go. we'd changed up his clothing arrangements several times since he was too tiny for some of the things we had in his closet. we were ready early and i just sat with nervous energy waiting for the time to pass. some how the last 30 minutes of this wait seemed like the longest time period of the entire journey. finally it was time to go.
we packed up the car and pulled out of our drive way for the last time as a family of two. will drove us to the hospital and i cried off and on until we arrived. since we were early we decided we'd make some public announcements as to today's plan via email/facebook. when it was close to time to be there we headed inside. we waited anxiously in the lobby of the hospital for the social worker to arrive. we've been working with an alternate social worker this week as our assigned social worker had to be away for a family emergency. when she arrived we found a spot in the lobby area to sit and complete our portion of the paperwork that remained. she went over everything with us and made sure we did not have any questions. before too long it was time to head upstairs.
tears were welling up as we walked the long corridor to our birth mother's hospital room. there was a heaviness that surrounded the situation and made me feel so overwhelmingly upset. we felt (and continue to feel) extreme sadness for her loss in knowing that the happiest day of our lives is one of the most difficult in hers. we wish there was something we could do to comfort her and help her heal as she works through this loss and grief. it's hard for me to feel the happiness i've longed for today when all i can think about is the sadness that consumes her.
however despite the gravity of the situation and the complexity of everything that envelopes us we know more than ever that God is just quite simply amazing. we don't really know how we got here, but today we brought home our son. daxton is the most amazingly perfect little fellow you've ever laid your eyes on. we praise God every minute that passes for this blessing and cannot wait to share how his little life will unfold. today - our sweet baby darling deer found his way to us. thank you daxton for finding us and calling us your family.