Monday, January 16, 2012

Lord, teach us how to pray

a lesson from a sermon.

"have you ever prayed for something and not gotten what you prayed for?"

have you ever thanked Jesus for NOT giving you what you asked for?

we were asked why we pray.  the general consensus was "to get stuff".  but after hearing the lesson - we see it's because we know our Father will only give us what we need.  we're praying for "YOUR" kingdom come - not "MY" kingdom come.  listening to this - i mean REALLY listening to this - hit me hard.  i have vividly haunting memories of being at work in the last bathroom stall praying to God that i was not having a miscarriage.  i prayed to God that i would do anything He wanted me to do if He would just let me keep this baby.  that was 8 years ago, but i can remember it like it was just an hour prior. at the time i could not understand why i could not have what i asked for.   i was not praying for a new car, or a house, or a new cell phone - but i was still praying for something that i wanted.  i was praying for my will to be done.  not what God wanted and knew i needed.  it hit me hard because i knew, sitting there listening to this sermon that if God had given me what i wanted then, i probably would not be Dax's mommy now.  that stirred up a wave in me that's pretty hard to digest. 

i thank Jesus that i was not given what i thought i needed in 2004, or in 2008, and thank God that He gave me Dax because he's more than i could have ever dreamed of.


Ashley said...

Great post! God always has a better plan!

Melodie said...

i've had similar thoughts and conversations with God. so thankful you are now on the other side of things and can see what He had planned all along!

Cat's Litterbox said...

Okay... I'm having a wave of emotion right now reading your post.

Honestly Adri, I don't talk about my infertility with a lot of people, and you're the ONLY (and I seriously mean ONLY) person that I feel "gets" the pain that I've been through. All my friends that thought they were infertile at one time have all had one, two, and three kids... ALL OF THEM.

I don't think I've ever made the TRUE connection that it's never my will be done. You're right... it's always been God's will, and again, as I prayed and cried for a baby and asked (begged and pleaded even) for the negative test to be a positive... it was all in God's hands.

Like you, had MY will been done, there would not be a Gus in my life and that makes me so very sad to think about. Whoa... I'm having a serious moment right now...

Your words caused a light bulb to go off. I've been grieving and crying for so long about what I can't have... that I've been blind to what I DO have.

Friend... you have no idea what impact your post just had on my life. YOU... my dear friend, may have just turned my life into a new direction and helped me get back to where I've been meant to be all along.

THANK YOU for being the channel that allowed God's message to reach me!!!

abby said...

Adri...I was wondering if you would be interested in allowing We Are Grafted In to use this post for our site. I think it would be very encouraging to those who are in the waiting process of adoption.

e-mail me if you are interested. I would like to use it for this Friday.

Thanks a lot!
abbylakers @ gmail . com